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Now I Rock – to Myself

Sometimes, after some period of time, we have to re-build our original personality, who we are in real, because time and situations do change us, and we can’t even realize it until we find ourself stuck up with the kind of person we are not, what we have become. There were times, when we were what we were, and then time comes when you are what others have made you, and you too are aware about it and still became it, as sometimes society rules over you, but then instead of giving such bullshit crap reasons of failure, if we indeed realize this phenomenon, we should start regaining and recollecting broken pieces of our original existence, original personality, don’t you think so? I guess, I should start with myself first 🙂 🙂

Recently, I was given this thought by couple of old friends who knew me the way I am not at present in totality. They said that, they found me more adjustable kind of guy who I am not in my natural way. This made me think about it for a while and I found out that they are so damn right!

I mean, I never used to be kind of person who would give a damn to a thing he doesn’t like. I mean, my communication and way of approach was direct, without any miscommunication nor with the communication to make others feel good or so, but then, as I grew (for that matter, grew up-side down), I adopted the habit of living for others, I mean, living the way I felt that they would accept me. Fuck! This is not how I used to be, and why the hell anyone should be?

After all, no matter what we do, or what we don’t do, we all got one life. And if at the end of it, I get to feel that oh! shit, I didn’t do it regardless I wanted to or say I feel that oh! shit I did it even though I didn’t want to, how shitty I would feel then?!!

Life is meant to be the way you want it to be, live. Every moment counts. And that every moment is full of existence, full of approvals from your side because that’s your fucking life. You shouldn’t live it to make others happy all the time, by killing your original personality.

And I don’t want to blame others here for having such change in our life. It’s just us who are responsible for anything and everything related to our life. No escaping or crying reasons, coz nobody will kill you if you don’t do something, utmost, they would hate you or stop communication if they find it so irritating or whatever, but then, it’s you, who should think twice whether it’s for you or not?

I remember, in early days, my communication style, writing style was full of fun, coz while used to write, I never used to think how would others feel. And you know what? Others used to enjoy it as well. Then, after as I felt that I am somewhat known among some people, while I was writing, the thinking also started that how would they feel about it? Now, this gives me creeps. I mean, if I’m writing, why the hell should I bother in advance how would they feel? And hence, the writing found a different shape, which was not original.

But having said this, and having realized this I am on the verge of recollecting all those broke pieces of my original personality, that I used to be, that I used to like about myself. Now, I rock – to myself.


Devang Vibhakar is the Founder and Editor of www.SpeakBindas.com. He has interviewed more than 350 people. His effort was recognized by Limca Book of Records, twice. He has been to Scotland as well as Germany as part of vocational & cultural exchange programs and has compiled five books so far. He's passionate about bringing forth interesting stories & interviews of entrepreneurs to avid readers of SpeakBindas. He can be reached here.

3 thoughts on “Now I Rock – to Myself

  1. Guru says:

    Hi Devang, nice to see your article on discovering “U”, i believe that we are moulded to such an extent that even to find the true U becomes difficult . Because even to know True U , we should first know what we r not,.. seems very confusing.
    But yes , one should atleast give a thought to it once .. by th way , i just noticed one thing , while you are tryng to find ur true nature, you are adopting the other peoples way of communicating to us 🙂 . To be frank , Shit, fucking , these have now become fillers and i feel we could better avaoid not becoz it means something bad but it will definately make us borrow others societies language which may not be suitable , becoz like everyone r unique, the culture n traditions should also be unique , else it will be such a carbon copies on earth with already so much carbon emissions 🙂
    Nice reading , thanks

  2. Jigar Patel says:

    Interesting & right on spot with this! In the ‘fear’ of being rejected/disliked by others we tend to restrict ourselves in ways we speak or act. And in the process…we do compromise the real ‘us’. It is one hurdle to identify the artificial areas within us and another to actually convert it to originality.

    You really pointed out something about ourselves that we usually ignore.

    Devang you really like to clean dust from the corners don’t you! Good work.

    GURU – Although i agree with the direction you are going i would also say that in my opinion ‘Culture’ is the most misunderstood & misused word i can think of. I find it hard to believe that ‘culture’ is associated with country/region. You are right that culture is unique. But unique to what? Country? household? or Individual?

    So if someone who is American has never been drinking alcohol, and married a bride of his parent’s choice–do you think he is following an Indian culture? If yes, then note that the same guy does not believe in Lord Krishna and eats non-veg. So a single individual is now living a life of combination of cultures and hence he can not be categorized under any one culture.

    I think at the end of the day– like Devang said–you should just be yourself and not worry about what culture to follow. This will classify yourself into a unique culture and a REAL YOU!


    1. Jigar, thank you for explaining on behalf of me 🙂

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